120 HAWAII PARENT July/August 2024 involved in losses. “Young athletes are smart and they pick up on all sorts of verbal and physical cues,” Coach Johnson says. If you’re yelling at a referee or vocally insulting the competition, your kids are going to model your poor behavior. The best parents encourage their kids to focus not only on winning, but on how the game is played. Offer praise and encouraging words to your child, their teammates, and the competition. WINNING GRACIOUSLY Winning is fun and exciting; it gives “Allowing them to lose in a safe place, like home, allows your child to deal with disappointment in privacy.” kids a sense of pride in their own accomplishments. For a child, the only thing worse than losing is seeing a winner gloat in their face. Good sportsmanship goes both ways, so encourage your child to be gracious winners. Learning to win graciously is just as important as learning to handle the disappointment of a loss. Tell them it’s great to be excited about their success without showing off. “Learning to win graciously is just as important as learning to handle the disappointment of a loss.” When your child wins, teach them to shake hands with the competition. It can be as simple as saying, “good game.” Discourage negative talk about competitors, and especially when a game is close, gently remind your child that the outcome could have easily been different. WINNING AND LOSING GRACIOUSLY The small losses in childhood games and sports prepare kids to deal with larger disappointments in the future. Coach Johnson said, “The skills learned in winning and losing in sports are simple tests compared to the real world. Sports are a controlled environment with coaches, officials, rules, and parameters. Once we reach adulthood, the lines become a little blurred. You are not always going to get that job or promotion. You may struggle at times. By learning how to win and lose graciously … at a young age, people are able to bounce back from disappointment easier in adulthood.” Encourage your child to stick with games until the end, and to give their all, no matter what the scoreboard says.
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